A Kiss Goodbye

We are packing up and heading out for the summer!  Or winter....depending on where you live.  I have survived another school year here, and it's been a doozy.

I had two dear friends that moved away.  I volunteered on the PTA board, and immediately regretted it.  I hung in, and while I wouldn't wish to repeat the experience, I'm glad I did it.  We visited Dubai and South Africa, and saw amazing sights.  The kids grew and thrived, and we've all gained even more patience and compassion from our time here.

We are leaving two weeks early, so we had to say our goodbyes to everyone in the neighborhood, and at school.  I am always extremely awkward at greetings and goodbyes here, because it's so different than what I'm used to.  You see, people here are kissers.  They kiss when they meet, they kiss when they say hello, they kiss goodbye......that's a LOT of kissing!  Some do the single kiss on the cheek.  Some do the double.  Some do a sort of combination, grab your shoulders and kiss you on each cheek.  I'm much more comfortable with a wave, a fist bump, a "Yo, how's it going?" sort of approach, but I'm definitely the odd man out.  Someone told me that in certain areas of Europe, they do up to SIX kisses at each greeting!  I'm so relieved we didn't move there!

So, two years down and one to go.  I'm still not completely loving this experience, but I'm confident that I can make the best of it.  Ciao, Luanda - I will see you in August....but I'm still not going to kiss you.

Sun City

Finally!  Here is the post about our trip to Sun City, South Africa.

This trip was the first time we've done any 'safari' activities, and now I can honestly say that I can see the appeal.  I'm not exactly a fan of 'roughing it' - so when I imagined a safari, I wasn't really enthused. I pictured dirt, bugs, heat.....all things that I've get more than enough of, living in Angola!  I couldn't have been more wrong, though - it was an amazing experience, getting to see the amazing animals of Africa.

Adam and Miles rode a mama elephant, whose baby followed the whole time, often nursing!

Taken from on top of a mountain, right before riding the longest, highest, fastest zip-line!

Zip-line - equal parts scary and terrifying!

This cheetah REALLY liked Adam. 

We rode elephants and did the zip-line.  We petted a cheetah, and watched warthogs run around.  We also ate at delicious restaurants, did a bit of shopping, Adam played golf, and Molly and I got our hair done!  It was a great mix of activities, and I'm so glad we went.  If you ever get a chance to visit Africa, I can't say enough good things about South Africa!  Every time we've visited, we've met the nicest people, and had a wonderful time.

Doing Good

I still need to post more pictures from our holiday to South Africa, but that will come a bit later today.  Right now, I want to make sure I write this, while it's fresh in my mind.

I've been in somewhat of a funk for the past few weeks.  There are a lot of reasons, but nothing huge.  As much as I've adapted and learned over the past 18 months, I think I'm still struggling with truly accepting my life here.  I've said before - I don't feel like I belong.  I have a lot of guilt over the undeserved blessings that we have, and there are many days that it feels like a sea of hopelessness is just outside my door.

I try and help where and when I can, but it never feels like enough.

Our maid, Sao, is a single mom.  She has three daughters that she is raising, and now she's also raising her young nephew. She comes to work every single day, with a smile on her face.  She is endlessly kind to me, to the kids, to Adam, to Fletcher.  Her quiet presence makes our house feel like a safe haven in this strange place.  I try to tell her, in my limited Portuguese, how much I appreciate her.  Today I think I was able to show her.

Beautiful Sao!

I made her a dress.  Such a simple thing, but she was SO happy!  She's never had something made just for her, and all of the money she makes goes to support her family.  She thinks that I gave her a gift, but I feel like I got the best gift of all.  In this one person's life, just for today, I made things better.  That's enough, at least for today.

A day in my life

Living an expat life is an entirely different experience from being in the US.  Because this is our first time doing an expat assignment, we've had to adjust to the shock of living in Angola, and adjust to being an expat family.  Angola is such an isolated place, with very few modern conveniences, so it makes the entire experience full of wild contrasts. I've written a lot about how I have to make all of our meals, and often I make a lot of things from scratch. But today, I have a professional chef in my kitchen, making some meals for us! In the US, this would be unheard of - a luxury!  Here, it's not unusual for families to employ a chef several days per week. It's very affordable, and not everyone wants to spend a good chunk of each day in the kitchen. I figure with one day of the chef here, we can get at least three dinners made - and it will cost less than going out to eat ONCE at a nice restaurant in Angola.  But it's still very weird for me to say to people back home, "oh yeah, the chef is here!"

Another odd thing is that the kids are not exposed to all of the commercials and advertisements that are a part of life in America. They have no clue what the latest toys are, what video game just came out, or what clothing is popular. This is a nice thing, because clearly, there's no access to those things anyway. The kids don't ask for toys, and in general, most of the kids here seem very unspoiled. At the same time, you'll hear the kids talking very casually about where they've just gone on holiday, where they're going on the next holiday, and what their chef is making for dinner!  Expat kids are likely to know all the different perks of flying business class vs. economy, and they learn quickly which airlines have the best kid-friendly in flight entertainment. As someone who grew up living in the same small town her entire childhood, these things are just so different (and funny) to hear.

So I guess like anything, there are good and not so good parts about living here.  Some days, it feels like the bad stuff outweighs the good....but it's definitely an experience that our family has gotten a lot out of, and for that, I'm very thankful.  Oh, and I'm also thankful for what our chef has made today! Stuffed chicken with roasted potatoes, lasagna, mini pizzas, couscous salad, marinara sauce with meatballs, banana muffins, and chocolate mousse. YUM!

Madikwe

Our vacation had two parts - for the first six days, we were in Sun City, South Africa.  It was tons of fun, and I will post those pictures in another post.  The final four days were spent at Tuningi Lodge in Madikwe Reserve, also in South Africa.  Those four days were the most amazing that we have had on vacation, and we literally have thousands of pictures.  I will try to share some of the best here.

The watering hole behind our lodge

One of only five cheetahs in the reserve

The animals usually let us get very close!

Us in front of a termite mound - impressive!

We saw, heard, and learned so much in our short time in Madikwe.  All five of us agreed that it was the best trip ever, and we'd love to go back.  It's the first time I've seen nature as beautiful as we experienced in Alaska, and it was awesome.  We met the nicest people, and it was really an experience I will treasure forever.

Fond Farewell

It's that time of year again - VACATION!!!  We are leaving today for our spring break, and I can hardly wait to get on the plane.  I don't care how long the flight is, I don't care if there's any shopping where we're going.....all I care about is knowing that we can leave Angola!

It's been a stressful few weeks here.  Being on the PTA board is awful (though I do love the girls who are on it with me), we've got water problems again, and there have been some robberies/shootings that have happened in places that we go to frequently.  So....this mama needs a getaway.

I was chatting with a neighbor yesterday, who told me that she thinks she might be able to compete with me for the 'house with the most problems' title in our neighborhood.  I laughed, because I had sort of forgotten that we are the proud holders of that title.  Anyway, she's had a leaking roof and mold, and no one seems to be able to fix it.  She has called the help desk numerous times, and each time is told that someone will come, but no one does.  This is nothing new.  What is new is that yesterday she called again, and they told her to be patient, because they'd hired a new service company.  The only catch?  The service company doesn't have any tools yet.  I'll just let that sink in for a moment.


Seriously?  A service company without tools.  Of course!  That, my friends, is the stuff that Angola is made of.

So yes, I'm really anxious to have a break from this place.  I will return with pictures, stories, and hopefully - renewed patience, because clearly I am going to need it!

Still here

I'm sorry!  I haven't posted in a month, and it's not because there hasn't been anything exciting, funny, or traumatic happening over here - I've just been a slacker about writing it down for you.  My mom came to visit for three weeks, and it was AMAZING!  Every hard thing in life seems a little easier with my mom around, and it was just what I needed.  The kids had a blast with her, and now that she's gone...it's tough.

But there's a story that I've been itching to share, and it's about my sweet oldest child.  I have hesitated to write many stories about him here, because he's getting older (12!).  I never want him to feel like I've embarrassed him by my posts, or betrayed his trust - so that's the reason you won't see me mentioning him as much as his siblings.  But rest assured, Max has given his permission for me to share this story, and I'm so glad he did!

My last post here was on Valentine's Day, and I had no idea what my boy was up to that day.  Adam had just left for London for a week, and when the kids came home from school, there was no mention of Valentine's Day.  Maybe 10 days later, a friend happened to casually mention to me that Max had bought flowers for a girl at school on Valentine's Day!  I was shocked, and because I'm a little bit of an oversensitive mama (maybe!), I was sad that Max hadn't told me.  My next reaction was concern, because how on earth did he pay for these flowers?  He hadn't asked me for money, and I knew that the money he had from Christmas and his birthday had long ago been spent.  I couldn't imagine how he had gotten the money to pay for these flowers (15 roses, in Angola!), purchased them, given them to a girl, and never uttered a word to me about it.

I imagined all sorts of scenarios.  Did he take the money from my purse without asking?  Did he borrow the money from a friend?  Nothing made sense, and I had an hour to obsess over it before Max got home.  By the time he walked in the door, I was a little crazy (maybe!) to get my questions answered.  Wouldn't you like to know where a kid gets $40 without his parents knowing, in a foreign country, with no access to relatives, mail, or any other source of cash?  I sat him down and demanded the answer.  After I let Max know that I had found out about his romantic purchase, he spilled the details.

When we came back from the US this summer, we brought a number of supplies with us.  One of the things we brought were a few large boxes of fruit rollups, for the kids to take in their lunch boxes.  It seems that my enterprising young son found out that these snacks were in high demand at his school, so he started selling them instead of eating them.  Can you guess how many fruit rollups he sold in order to make $40?





Two.  Who knew that there was such a market over here for fruit snacks?!  If you're planning a trip to Angola, forget packing clothes and shoes - bring some fruit rollups!  I know a kid who can turn those snacks into cash for you.