How Angola says, "Good Morning"

I had a post ready for today, telling you about Adam and I going golfing.  I was relaxed, puttering around the house after putting the kids on the school bus.  I went to let Fletcher out the back door, and as soon as I slid open the glass, I felt something big fly into my hair and stay there.  I reacted like any reasonable person, and started screaming and shaking my head.  Nothing fell out onto the ground, so I started wondering if I'd imagined it.....and then I looked down at my shirt.

"Good morning, Katie!"

Sometimes....I really hate Africa.

Thankful

As everyone at home is gearing up for Thanksgiving, I'm feeling a little sad that we're left out.  True, we will celebrate with a few other fabulous families on Saturday, but I am sad that we don't get to be with our fabulous family.  I do, however, have a lot to be thankful for.  In no particular order, the things I'm really thankful for are:

1) Technology.  Sure, the internet connection here is really sporadic and slow, but it does allow us to keep in touch with our loved ones.  Hearing my mom's voice, getting a voicemail from my dad, and laughing with friends are all a huge boost to me.

2) Love.  The kids are so loving and sweet (most of the time) and sometimes it is hard to believe that I really could be so blessed.  Max has his own cell phone (with only a few key adults' phone numbers programmed into it) and he texts me every day when he gets out of school.  Yesterday's text said, "On bus.  Been here 4 a long time.  How was ur day?  I'm sure mine will get a lot better when I see u!"

3) Our house.  This is kind of ridiculous, since our house has been the source of so much stress - but I still am very thankful for it.  We have a place to sleep each night, and a place that we're making many good memories in.  It's the middle of the hot, rainy season here, and we've had lots of nights where there is rain and lightning - which doesn't affect us.  Our maid, however, has had her house flood, and her kids have had to shovel out water and mud.  She's hoping to save up to afford a cement floor soon, so that she doesn't have these problems.  I am very, very thankful.

So You're Thinking About Moving to Angola...

I've had a fair number of conversations with women who are considering moving to Angola with their spouse. Each time, I'm reminded of just how much I've adapted and changed in just one year.  When we first found out that Angola was a possibility, I was panicked at the thought of moving to Africa.  I searched online for a blog that might help, but found very little information.  If you are thinking about becoming an expat here, I'd like to share some thoughts that I think would be helpful.

1) You CAN survive here.  It sounds crazy, and lots of people might tell you that you shouldn't consider it - but the fact is, there are a LOT of expat families here who are happy and thriving.  If this is your first expat experience, then it will be a huge learning curve for you, but it absolutely CAN be done.

2) Practice the "at least" game.  Your car broke down?  At least you have a car!  The heater doesn't work?  At least you have blankets!  It sounds silly, but this skill is invaluable when you live here.  It doesn't solve your problems, but it CAN be the difference between getting bogged down by your problems or moving on.  It could always be worse!

3) If you're worried about your kids, don't be.  The kids adapt way faster than us adults, and honestly I think their lives are pretty darn great here.  They learn great life skills, they forge tight bonds with their siblings, and in a lot of places, they have more freedom than they would back in the US.  In our compound, for example, my three kids can walk to the playground and play unsupervised.  They know that they can go to roughly any of twenty different houses in the neighborhood, and count on an adult being there to help them.  They will have stories to last them the rest of their lives, and a broader knowledge of the world than kids who haven't lived abroad.

4) There are plenty of things that you can't buy here - but you can usually bring them.  A lot of people (including me) get hung up on the stuff that you can't get here.  Clothing, appliances, toiletries, waffles....the list is long, but if you're willing to plan a little, and put in a little extra effort - you can have whatever you deem necessary.

That's it for now, but I hope this helps someone feel reassured that life here isn't totally miserable.  Sometimes it is, but that's true anywhere.  And even though I still struggle with the challenges here, I think the good outweighs the bad.

International Day 2012

One of the very best parts of living overseas (in my humble opinion) is that our whole family is exposed to amazing people, cultures, and experiences that we would never see in the US.  The international school that our kids attend has a yearly event that really exemplifies why I feel that all of the struggles that come with living here are worth it.  International Day is a time for all of the countries represented by students in the school to teach us about their country.  Families come together to have a booth for each country, where they prepare food to share, maps, costumes....really anything and everything that they feel is important to represent about their country.  On the day of the event, there is a parade and performances.  Kids and adults visit each booth, and it is an amazing experience.  This year I was up close and personal to all of the action, because the PTA organizes International Day!  It was a lot of work, a lot of stress and sweat and possibly a bit of swearing.....but it was a success!

I'm so glad that my kids have this chance to be exposed to so many beautiful cultures and people, and I'm proud that I helped to make the day great.....but I will NOT be volunteering for the PTA next year! It is a ton of work, and I have so much respect for the women who have done it more than once!

Weight

Sorry!!!  My poor little blog has been ignored for the past few weeks, and it isn't because I don't have stories to tell, or photos to share....it's because I've been overwhelmed with activities and responsibilities and truthfully, I've been a little depressed.  The PTA group is such a great bunch of ladies, and having all of the planning and tasks involved with that has helped make the last couple of months pass quickly - but not quickly enough.  It's been 16 weeks since we left the US, and I've been feeling every one of those weeks weighing on me.  I really expected that by now - our second year into the Angola experience - I would have adjusted to life here and wouldn't be so bogged down by all of it.  I know I have adjusted so much, but it's still not enough to say that I'm enjoying it, truthfully.  I'm trying, I am trying my very best, every day, to push through my frustrations and sadness and make the most of it - but I still very much wish I could hop back on a plane to Alaska and forget this expat nonsense.

"Mom, how can you not be happy?"

What's stopping me from throwing in the towel here?  The fact that the other four members of my family are thriving here.  Adam is constantly exhausted, but he enjoys his job and takes pride in doing it.  Max, Molly, and Miles are all doing great in school and you would never know that they're missing any part of living in a civilized country.  They miss their family and friends back in the US, but they have adapted and blossomed in more ways than I could have predicted.  So what is wrong with me?

Maybe I lived too long in the US, and I just can't quite give up the notion that things SHOULD be easier.  Definitely I'm spoiled.  But I'm not giving up.  I refuse to give more weight to my needs than those of my family, and they are most definitely doing great here.  I just need to figure out how to get with the program, and find a way to make it great for me, too.